Rules for a Happy Life, Part 6

Here we go again. You can see this is “Part 6,” so that means there are several other blogs with rules for a happy life. I have lots of good ideas from things I have learned through time. Some of these things I have learned because I got it right, and some I learned because I got it wrong and wished I had done it differently the first time. We all live and learn, but hopefully, you will learn how not to cause yourself trouble a bit by what I am sending out.

If it isn’t yours, don’t take it. Taking it will only cause you trouble. Even if you think you got away with it, you didn’t.

51. It is only logical not to lie and steal. If you do things that are dishonest, people no longer trust you. You might think you are winning, but in the long run, you don’t. Even if no one catches you, you have hurt people. I know a guy who took off with money that belongs to the church. I tried to tell the other members of the church what he was doing, and they said if he wanted it that bad, just let him have it and don’t worry about it. However, because he left with all the money, he lost all his friends who used to trust him and he lost the girl he wanted to marry. What good is all that money without the close relationships he used to have? He only hurt himself because he is all alone now, and people don’t trust him. If a husband tells lots of lies to his wife or visa versa, they just destroy the trust in a marriage. If there is no trust, there is nothing left in a relationship.

The guy was actually getting drunk to try to get a reaction out of his wife. Sometimes is its better to just say or do nothing.//Photo by Malcolm Garret on Pexels.com

52. Some people just like to fight. Don’t fight with them, and they will stop. If someone says something bad to you, they expect a bad response. If they get no response, they are left up in the air and don’t know what to do. I heard a story once that was true, and I took note because things that Jesus said underscored what happened, and I knew Jesus was right. There was a woman who went to a preacher complaining because her husband was always coming home drunk and beating her up. The preacher said, “What do you do when he comes home drunk?” She said, “I am angry, of course.” The preacher said, “Next time, don’t get angry.” She thought he was crazy, but she took his advice. The next time her husband came in, she just ignored him and wasn’t angry. The husband was confused. He didn’t know what to do, so he went to his bed and went to sleep. Any time he came in drunk, she didn’t get angry, and he just went to sleep. After a while, he stopped drinking and coming home drunk. After that, he went to church and became a Christian. The preacher decided to ask him why he stopped drinking and beating on his wife. He said, “Well, if she wasn’t going to get angry, it wasn’t any fun anymore.” He had actually enjoyed getting drunk and beating on her and was doing it to get her to fight with him because he though it was fun. When Jesus tells us to turn the other cheek when someone hits us on the cheek, he knew what he was talking about.

Trying to live in a mansion on this earth will only bring your problems. This place needs lots of security, lots of maids, gardeners, etc.

53. Mink coats are too heavy and cause jealousy. Everyone thinks they want to be rich enough to own a mink coat. However, my husband bought me a mink coat once. It was pretty, but it was so heavy it hurt my shoulders to wear it. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but I didn’t want it. In fact, I never really wanted it. There are better things to do with that money. If you have a big fancy house, it is the first place someone will try to break in to to steal, so you spend all your time trying to figure out how to secure your house, and it can become a burden. We only need a regular coat. We only need a regular house. We don’t need all the extra stuff. Who really needs lots of diamond jewelry? It is only there for people to look at, and people will try to steal it. Do something better with your money.

Go to bed at night. Staying awake will only make the next day hard.

54. Know when to stop. I have to go and be back in a little while. It is 4:22, and I have an appointment at 5:00. If I just sit her typing, I will be late. I know when to stop.I made it to my appointment on time, and got everything done quickly and came home. Things went smooth because I didn’t complicate it by not stopping and making myself late. When you are tired, take a break. Go to bed at night. My mother always said, “Rome wasn’t built in a day” if I wanted to just keep working and working without stopping. She always reminded me that it would all still be there tomorrow, and I could rest and finish tomorrow.

Just because you don’t have a chance to be in a classroom, it doesn’t mean you can’t pick up a book and keep learning.,

55. Never stop studying. This is the advice that my dad gave me, and I am so happy be did! You don’t have to go to school to study. Pick up a book and learn something. My dad studied til the day he died. He had a heart attack in the middle of the night while he was away listening to the Spanish channel on TV trying to make his Spanish better. He should have taken y mother’s advice and left it for the next day. However, he needed to study. When he was a little boy, some teacher called him stupid and he never forgot. The teacher said he would never learn anything and be a failure in life. My dad worked at an embassy. He could fix any car. He could build a television. He could build a house and do everything himself, even the electricity and the plumbing. He was at the top of his field in electricity, as an aircraft electrician, a journeyman electrician who built power plants, and a house electrician. He spoke four languages. When he died, the preacher said my dad was the smartest man he ever met. He taught at a university, but didn’t even have a B. A degree. I listened, and I speak five languages fluently and bits and pieces of several other languages. I am an English university professor, but I have the proper education to do it. I agree with my dad. Everything I have learned helps. Never stop studying. I only had two years of high school Spanish, but I didn’t stop Spanish after high school. I traveled in Mexico. I read the Bible in Spanish. I worked on a Mexican ministry. A university was desperate because they needed a Spanish teacher. The rector heard I spoke Spanish and called me up and asked me to teach Spanish at the university. It got my foot in the door, and I didn’t even apply for the job. Just keep studying. Learn whatever you can. Learn whatever interests you. You won’t be sorry.

Books are more satisfying than television.

56. Read a lot. You can’t get on TV or in movies what you can get in books. The book is always better than the movie. When you read, you learn. You enlarge your vocabulary. You learn new grammar instinctively. You broaden your thinking. On top of all this, it can be downright fun. You just have to actually pick the book up, start reading, and let yourself get into it. Let yourself sink into the book. Some books are harder to get into than others, but learn the joy of books. You will never be sorry.

Use those ears God gave you.

57. Listen. You can learn so much by listening. The more you know and understand,t he better your life is. One of the ways I learn foreign languages is by listening to people talk. If you are in a classroom, listen to what that teacher says. Especially, if the teacher says it more than once. If the teacher ends up saying it three times, you better memorize it on the spot because it is considered important. When a preacher preaches, it is his job to tell you how to have a better life to make you happy. Listen to him. If older people tell stories about their lives, listen. You might learn something. I always loved talking with old people. I used to visit my great grandmother just to listen to her stories because they were extremely interesting. Now a days, people in the family have questions about this or that,and I know the answer because she told me. One of the reasons I like to learn foreign languages is to talk to the old people. They can teach you things books can’t.

This guy is president because he was thorough and did all his homework before he ever took the test.

58. Always do your homework. If you want to do something, you have to know about it first. Did you know that one of the ways President Trump got elected was by talking to people who had gotten themselves elected. He learned their strategies before he ever decided to run for president. Smart businessmen go and talk to people who are doing a business they are thinking about doing and learn about it before they decided to try it. They study the business first. If a teacher gives you homework, go home and do it right away, even if it is just reading. If the teacher says, “read the chapter,” read that chapter. When you have to do more in that class, it will be easier if you read the chapter when you were told. In high school, I made extremely high grades and got lots of awards. In my history class, the other students ignored the teacher when he said to read the chapter, but I always read it, and I made the highest grade on every test in my history class. Doing my homework gave me the answers. President Trump knew how to become president because he did his homework.,

She became a famous movie star by working within the system. She figured out what people wanted and gave it t them. Everyone thinks of her a a dumb blonde, but she laughed her way to the bank. She was very smart. She figured out they liked blonde hair and dyed her hair. She figured out they wanted a sexy girl, so she became that sexy girl.. She figured out they didn’t want a smart girl so she acted dumb. She got what she wanted by playing the system. In the long run, though, she wanted the wrong things, so she wasn’t happy in the end Money and fame weren’t what would make her happy, and she didn’t learn it until it was too late. However, she worked the system better than anyone, and she made it to the top.

59. Listen to everything your teacher says and do it exactly as they say. This is the advice I gave my kids when they began school. I didn’t want them getting in trouble at school. I wanted them to make good grades. They did as I said, and for the most part, didn’t get in trouble and made good grades. Know who is in charge. Don’t, as my dad would have said, “buck the system.” You will only cause yourself trouble if you do. Being rebellious brings condemnation down on your head. People may think it is cool to be rebellious, but if you are too rebellious, it could land you in jail. The system is the system. Unless you are the one making the rules, you just have to accept the rules that are and learn to work within the system. I have a black friend who told me about the advice his dad gave him as a black man. He said to him that life is what it is. People are the way they are. He wanted to see his son succeed and have a good life. He was afraid that being black would go against his son, so he told his son that if he wanted to make the white man accept him, he had to be better than the white man. He gave his son the advice to go to church, do the right thing, and go to school getting the best grades, even to graduate school. He taught his son how to live in the system and make it in the system. His son became a missionary to Africa. He got what he wanted, and it made him happy. Rebellion only causes trouble. His dad was wise. If you want to make it in this world, you are going to have to accept that things are the way they are and work within the system. Doing things inside the law is always better than fighting with the law.

When someone is sad, all they want is to know you care. Give them a hug and say, “I am sorry.” It is enough.

60. If someone dies and you are expected to say something, just say you are sorry. it is enough. No one wants you to tell them the story of your dead friend or relative showing you understand. No one needs a flowery speech. They just need you to show up and tell them you care. You can’t stop their grief. You can make them feel they are not alone by talking a lot. You could be a sounding board to let them talk. They don’t want to hear you talk. They only want to know you care. I was a preacher’s wife. Preacher’s wives are expected to take care of grieving people among many other things. In the beginning, I had no idea how to be a preacher’s wife. I wasn’t used to being around people who had had a death in the family or who had a good friend who passed away. I was at a loss in the beginning, and an older preacher gave me this advice, and I took it, and it works. They just want to know you are there and you care. The three little words, “I am sorry” is all you need. Don’t fret about how to handle it.

The things I am writing here are tried and true. They come from a life time worth of experience and even more because I have a tendency to listen to everyone else. I listen. I watch. I take mental notes. I have always been the person who watches what is going on around me. If I see someone make a mistake and cause trouble for themselves, I won’t go that way. If I see someone do something good, I take note. I want to share with you the things I have learned. I hope these help you.

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